Chaye Sarah

 Something is hidden in the story of Sarah. Sarah is the first major female character since mother Eve. The first verse:

וַיִּהְיוּ֙ חַיֵּ֣י שָׂרָ֔ה מֵאָ֥ה שָׁנָ֛ה וְעֶשְׂרִ֥ים שָׁנָ֖ה וְשֶׁ֣בַע שָׁנִ֑ים שְׁנֵ֖י חַיֵּ֥י שָׂרָֽה׃ 

Sarah’s lifetime—the span of Sarah’s life—came to one hundred and twenty-seven years.

Ibn Ezra deals with this. 

חיי. לשון רבים ולא יתפרדו.

THE LIFE OF. The word life (chayyim) is always encountered in the plural. We never find it separated (יתפרדו)

The verse reminds us that life is not  entirely a singular thing. We lives several lives in succussion and simultaneously.   The text separates these three phases of Sarah's life.  She had a life in Ur, prior to the migration to Canaan.  She had the life in Canaan prior to her name change, and she had the life of the mother and defender of Isaac. Other divisions are equally plausible. The word  שָׁנָ֛ה  shanah, translated here as "year" also means "change."

 The reading of Chaye Sarah, the obituary of our founding mother, marks the week of my own mother's passing. My mother also had (at least) three lives. She was a girl and young woman in Poland.  She was born in an authentic shtetl: outhouse, no running water, kapotes, no cars.  All people go through childhood.  It is a clear developmental stage, not unlike the larva and pupa stages of insects. The imprints of childhood and adolescence are deep; the memories are few but significant. The memories of the shtetl that my mother shared  with us convinced us that she came from a different planet and certainly did not understand our issues. I am sure that, at least sometimes, my children felt the same way about me. I cannot imagine Ur.

When my mother had therr first child (my sister Fayge), they were on the run from "liberated" Poland.  Although the Nazi antisemites had been vanquished, the small family: my mother, father and sister,  were threatened with murder under the new regime, and were forced to run. They, like Abraham and Sarah, had to leave the country of their birth. The story in the Torah has Gd telling Abraham to move on; sometimes Gd tells people to do things they would have done, even in the absence of Divine instruction. Sometimes people do the Divine will in the absence of an instruction. The backstory of Abraham and Sarah is left open. 

The attention afforded Sarah is unusual in this overwhelmingly male-dominated Torah. Sarai's marriage to Avram is mentioned in the post flood genealogy. The couple's reproductive difficulties are mentioned ( Sarai is blamed, of course). When Avram's father (and Sarai's grandfather) Terah left Ur and headed toward Canaan, Sarai is included by name. She was an unusual woman indeed, given the times she lived in. All of this unusual recognition of an ancient woman implies some hidden features that overwhelmed the customs of that age. 

 My parents fled to the American sector of occupied Germany, to DP camp. The "displaced" [disenfranchised, stateless] inmates had ration cards.  They had more access to food than the recently overcome enemy, the native Germans. A clever man, like my father, could trade food coupons for Leica cameras and diamonds. He did... and he landed in jail. My mother  went to the Rabbi for advice. Somehow, the Rabbi converted a diamond into freedom for my father. To me, it feels like a twist of the Abimelech story in last week's parsha and the Pharoah story the week before. The wife saves the husband. Compromise always contains ambiguity. 

My parents and sister finally came to the USA. My mother and father lived by their wits, in a twilight zone of poverty, ambition and modicums of success.  A new generation arose; the children were protected.  My mother survived these hundreds of crises. 

Sarah's fierce defense of Isaac is her most famous action. It is a complex story. Sarah had suggested that Abraham have a child with his slave, Hagar. Hagar was to be a surrogate. Instead Hagar acted as a mother. Sarah was excluded. That plan failed. 

Sarah did, eventually, as promised, have a son. She would not allow a competitor, Ishmael. Over Abraham's reluctance, she insisted that the older son be exiled. When Sarah died, Abraham had to ascend from Beersheba to Kirith Arba to bury and cry over her. Beersheba was Ishmael's neighborhood.  Were Abraham ( and Isaac) visiting Ishmael? 

As events fade into the past, only incomplete stories remain. Every story hides as it reveals. I sense that my parents had many secrets that they did not share with their children. I think it has been that way since the ancient times. My fantasies fill in the gaps with a mutable mesh. It's OK if I don't know some things. Some things are better not asked.